Decisions Desicions

I need to blog. I love to blog. There's so much to share. I have a 5 week old, beautiful baby girl that I haven't written anything about. I need to blog. But then there's sleep...I need to sleep. I love to sleep. They say sleep when the baby sleeps....that's not always practical. During one of my prenatal visits the midwife and I were talking about being proactive against any kind of postpartum "blues" since that was so prominent after Katelynn was born and she said a huge help would be to do my best to get a 4-hour chunk of sleep every 24 hours. I thought, oh, that's all I need? I can do that. I can count on one hand how many times that's happened in the last 5 weeks. Surprisingly I'm still functioning! Some days better than others. But I'm starting to see that I really do need to work on getting just a bit more. Yes, I need to sleep. But I also need to eat. Knowing that keeping my body healthy will help maximize any sleep I do eventually get.  Quite often I just plain forget. I get wrapped up in feeding Ashley, taking care of Katelynn, getting us ready to go here or there, and realize I haven't eaten since dinner!  So I'm trying to do better with my mornings, but when I'm faced with the decision of what to do with the unknown amount of time I have between Ashley finally falling asleep and Katelynn not yet waking up, the decisions aren't so easy. I don't know how long I have so do I chance going to sleep and only getting 20 mins? If I take time to eat something I'll have less time to do anything else, like get on the computer and somehow connect with the outside world :). But when I get on the computer there's just so much to do! So I decided it was time to blog, at least to let people know I'm alive! Then I'll get something to eat. Oh, look, Katelynn's awake! Good thing I didn't try going to sleep! Maybe I'll get a nap later....ha, right!  Because when that opportunity presents itself, I'll once again have to decide: I need to sleep, I need to eat, write thank you's, shower, grocery shop, reply to e-mails, do the dishes, pack up maternity clothes, blog, post photos, send out birth announcements, connect with friends, (assuming they remember who I am after all this time!) :) plan playdates for Katelynn, uh, just writing that list makes me want to take a nap. After I get Katelynn and I something to eat.

But on a lighter note, this morning while Ashely was awake from 2-4:30, I think I got my first real smile. Not those gastro induced ones she's done since we brought her home that she does in her sleep, but a real, eye contact open mouth grin. What a cutie!