Sticks and Stones

I heard someone make a judgmental comment the other day and didn't think much of it. It was in character for them and I did what I could to dismiss it. It wasn't directed at me personally, but it very well could have been. The criticism was aimed at a "nameless and faceless" individual on TV who wouldn't hear the jeering comment or be shamed by the judgment that was being sentenced through the screen. But as I sat in silence, I painfully knew that person could very easily be me and I wondered if the same comments would have been said if was me.

It wasn't until I heard my 4 year old repeat the exact same expression the very next day that it broke my heart. She didn't know what she was saying, she was just repeating what she had heard. But this time, it hurt. She said it with the same attitude and belittling she had heard it said the day before. Again, it wasn't directed at me personally, but hearing that criticism and condescending attitude come from my sweet preschooler was heart breaking. I stopped in my tracks and tried to gently explain to her why what she said was not okay, how it hurts people's feelings when those things are said, and that compassion was a better choice instead of finger pointing. I tried to explain that the person who said it wasn't being nice, without making them out to be a bad person. But it made me so painfully aware how easily we pass on our values to our children and how easily they pick up on things. Now, granted, this little 4 year old has always been extremely perceptive and picked up on things way too quickly! But this incident made me want to be more careful of how I say things and be aware of how they may be perceived by 4 year old little ears and to encourage anyone who is around her, or any child for that matter, to be aware of what you say. Preschoolers don't get sarcasm and don't really have a sense of when something is a joke and when it's not or when something is appropriate to be repeated or not. If you wouldn't say something to someone's face, don't say it around a child....because they probably will.

"Stick and stones may break my bones....but words will break my heart." Choose your words wisely. Please.